The years went by after I lost my mother. I ended up living in a small house in Torrance California. My roommate and best friend of all time Steve and I used to go to his Church like all good Catholics do... Around Christmas and Easter every year. We even went one step beyond that, and went to a few "Youth Masses" on Sunday nights. It had a little more upbeat music, and wasn't crawling with half-dead old people.
St. Lawrence Martyr Catholic Church is a beautiful place of worship in Redondo Beach, Ca.
I liked St. Lawrence so much that I married my lovely wife there. I remember that they made us jump through a few hoops in order to be allowed to have our wedding there. We had to meet with one of the Priests, (lucky for us it was the young one, Father Chris, the cool one) and discuss several topics that the church holds firm to. Topics like premarital sex, contraception, and raising children in the Catholic Church.
By contraception, I mean the lack of it. The Catholic Church made it very clear that it is a sin against God for a married couple to use any kind of birth control whatsoever. Married sex is sacred, and to be enjoyed by the husband, wife, and Jesus. That's right... Jesus too...
Father Chris explained to us (while using a dry erase board) how to successfully utilize the "rhythm method", also known as the "Pull and Pray", or "only have sex a few days prior to the monthly time when the Mrs. has to use products with wings" method.. If you know what I mean....
You see, when a husband and wife have sex, it's not just them in the room. Sex while within the bond of Holy Matrimony is always between a man, a woman, and Jesus.
To this day, I can picture J.C. getting it on with my wife and I in a twisted version of a cosmic threesome....
You ever wonder if J.C. wears underwear under his robe... Well I know...
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2 comments:
OOOOOOOOOOOO ze double team!!! YA!
do you call it a "Jeeway"?
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